oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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