Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(217): View more from Illinois

I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.

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(626): View more from California

My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".

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(714): View more from California

Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.

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(708): View more from Illinois

Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic

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(718): View more from New York

He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come

(804): View more from Virginia

and you stopped teaching...why?

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(312): View more from Illinois

Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit

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(330): View more from Ohio

Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl

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