you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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