this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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