I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
operation harelip BJ is a go
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
