When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
