this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
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