Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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