he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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