Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
