She's JV to your varsity
I met the friendliest cop last night
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
