I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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