Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
