he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
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