I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize