Me. At least after what I've been through.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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