So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
