i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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