Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize