Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
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