I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
