angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
