Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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