You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
