we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.