took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
ttyl tear gas
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
