Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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