Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Randomize
