we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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