sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Soap is not a condiment
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I have peed in a lot of sinks
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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