Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
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