He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
