I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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