bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
