just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
