Pregnant stripper...not hot.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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