wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
