I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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