I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
