after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
