i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
