Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
