he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
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