it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
