you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Randomize
