smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
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