Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
