And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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