On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
