You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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